Jeffrey showed up at one of my 5-Day Inner Bonding Intensives to deal with his alcoholism and resulting relationship problems. His past two marriages had ended in messy divorces. His business was falling apart. Yet in the face of all of this, Jeffrey could not or would not stop drinking.
Two things were immediately apparent in my first session with Jeffrey. First, he had completely abandoned himself, making others responsible for his self-worth. Due to his unwillingness to take responsibility for his own feelings, he was constantly pulling others for approval with his niceness. His inauthentic saccharine niceness felt like sticky glue trying to ooze its way into having control over getting others approval. Needless to say, it was not working for him.
Second, he had no spiritual connection, no Source to turn to for love, comfort and guidance. As anyone who has attended AA knows, being able to turn to a spiritual Source is essential for healing. The support of the people within the program can help sustain abstinence, but true healing comes from the inner spiritual connection.
No one had ever confronted Jeffrey with how much they were put off by his...
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