Read This Article If You Enjoy Eating

| Total Words: 630

I’d like to start today by asking everyone who enjoys eating to raise his/her hand. That’s it? Come on, I know more of you love eating than that. Don’t be shy. If you love stuffing your face with sweets and junk food until you look like a squirrel hording food for the winter, throw your hand up. If you live for all-you-can-eat rib night at Billy’s Arcade & BBQ, throw your hand up. If your midnight snack lasts 2 hours and includes more than one course, put your hand in the air and wave it like you just don’t care. I’m not here to judge anyone today, I just want to know where my food lovers are.

That’s much better! I’m seeing a lot more hands in the air now. There’s still a gentleman in the rear who, judging from his bodily proportions, looks to be a regular at the Shoney’s All Day-Everyday Buffet whose hand is not up, but if he doesn’t feel comfortable participating then he doesn’t have too. Or maybe he’s just to full to move. Whatever the case I’m glad most of you decided to play along. You may now put your hands down.

We have established that almost everyone here today loves...

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