Vanessa, 30 years old, is struggling with whether or not to end her six-year marriage. The answer is not at all clear to her.
Vanessa and Jon have a good marriage. They are kind and caring with each other. They enjoy many of the same things. So why is Vanessa in such turmoil over whether to stay or leave?
The problem is that Vanessa is very lonely with Jon. They are good friends, but they are not emotionally intimate. Jon has no desire to share any of his feelings with Vanessa, nor does he have any desire to understand Vanessas feelings. He is content to keep everything on the surface, while Vanessa wants a deeper emotional connection.
Since they have many good things in their marriage, Vanessa has decided to try marriage counseling, and Jon has agreed. Counseling or not, there is only one thing that can save this marriage Jon and Vanessa shifting out of their intent to protect against pain and into an intent to learn about what is loving to themselves and each other.
Jons intent has always been to protect against pain rather than to learn about being loving to himself and others. He has done this by numbing out his feeling with marijuana and work....
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